
Understanding Coercive Control and Its Impact on Wellbeing
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Coercive control is a subtle yet deeply harmful form of abuse that can have lasting effects on a person’s mental, emotional, and even physical wellbeing. Unlike physical violence, coercive control is often difficult to identify because it operates through patterns of behaviour designed to dominate and undermine a person’s sense of self. Understanding coercive control is essential in recognising its impact and supporting those affected by it.
What is Coercive Control?
Coercive control refers to a pattern of controlling behaviours that restrict a person’s freedom, autonomy, and self-esteem. It can occur in any relationship, including romantic partnerships, family dynamics, or even workplace settings. Some common signs of coercive control include:
Isolation – The perpetrator restricts access to family, friends, and support networks through manipulation tactics such as guilt tripping and gaslighting.
Manipulation – Distorting reality through gaslighting and lies to make the victim doubt their perceptions.
Surveillance and Monitoring – Controlling access to phones, emails, or social media, and excessive questioning about whereabouts and how a person spends their time.
Financial Control – Restricting access to money, making all financial decisions and controlling all household income typically masked a means to benefit the home and/or family, dictating type of employment and location, forcing financial dependence.
Threats and Intimidation – Using fear, shame, or implied threats to maintain control.
Undermining Self-Worth – Constant criticism, belittling, and eroding confidence and independence.
Less commonly recognised signs of coercive control include:
Excessive Rule-Making – Setting strict rules around daily routines, diet, clothing, or hobbies.
Love-Bombing Followed by Withdrawal – Overwhelming affection and attention used as a means of control, followed by emotional distance when compliance isn’t met.
Using Children or Pets – Threatening to take away or harm children or pets as a form of control, threatening to tell children stories about the individual to ensure compliance.
Forcing Compliance Through Guilt – Using guilt-tripping tactics to make the victim feel responsible for the abuser’s emotions or actions and/or implying other people are talking about the individual.
Distorting Reality – Rewriting past events to make the victim question their memory or perspective.
Exerting Control Over Health and Wellbeing – Preventing access to medical care, dictating food intake, or enforcing unhealthy lifestyle habits.
In the UK, coercive control has been recognised as a criminal offence under the Serious Crime Act 2015. However, due to its insidious nature, many individuals do not immediately realise they are experiencing abuse.
The Impact of Coercive Control on Wellbeing
The long-term effects of coercive control can be profound, affecting every aspect of a person’s wellbeing.
Mental and Emotional Health
Victims often experience anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The constant fear and stress of trying to avoid conflict or punishment can lead to hypervigilance, self-doubt, and emotional exhaustion.
Physical Health
The ongoing stress associated with coercive control can contribute to physical health issues such as headaches, digestive problems, sleep disturbances, and weakened immune function. In extreme cases, victims may develop chronic illnesses due to prolonged stress exposure.
Social Wellbeing
Isolation from friends and family can lead to loneliness and a loss of social support. Victims may struggle to rebuild relationships, particularly if they have been manipulated into distrusting others.
Self-Identity and Confidence
Coercive control erodes a person’s sense of self. Victims may feel worthless, incapable, or trapped in their situation. Over time, they may struggle to make independent decisions or believe in their own judgement.
Healing and Recovery
Recovering from coercive control is a journey that requires support, education, and self-compassion. Here are some steps that can help:
Recognising the Signs – Understanding coercive control is the first step to breaking free from its grip.
Seeking Support – Friends, family, GPs, therapists, and support groups can provide comfort, validate a persons feelings and help rebuild confidence.
Rebuilding Independence – Encouraging financial independence, decision-making skills, and self-care practices can empower survivors.
Legal Protection – Seeking legal advice and protection through domestic abuse services can be essential for safety and recovery.
Final Thoughts
Coercive control is a damaging form of abuse that can significantly impact wellbeing. Raising awareness and fostering a supportive environment for survivors is crucial in helping them regain autonomy and rebuild their lives. If you or someone you know is experiencing coercive control, reaching out for help can be a vital first step towards healing.
Some places you can begin: